1. The 'why didn't you look where you were kicking it' moment if the day
After a tremendous run across the lines of the French defence, James Milner brilliantly rounded Hugo Lloris. But with the goal gaping, the City utility man failed to look up, stabbed an apologetic effort wide and fell to the ground in a crumpled mess. Milner
2. Nomad of the day
The elf-like figure of Christian Wilhelmsson bolstered Sweden's midfield against the Ukraine. The 32-year-old Al Ahli man is not only one of the few in Poland and Ukraine to ply his trade outside of Europe, but it turns out he’s actually played for more clubs than any other man at Euro 2012. For the record, that's nine: Mjallby, Stabaek, Anderlecht, Nantes, Roma, Bolton, Deportivo La Coruna, Al-Hilal, Al Ahli.
3. Pointless journey of the day
Despite being assured by the FA and Uefa that provisions had been made, the England fans’ band were refused entry to the Donbass Arena, having driven 2,500 miles to get there. The band, sponsored by Pukka Pies, hadn’t missed a game for 18 years, a run of more than 300 fixtures home and away, but that came to an end in Donetsk last night. The band’s representatives will be appealing to Uefa and hope to be allowed in - instruments included – for the Sweden game on Friday.
4. Competition winner of the day
Congratulations to 22-year-old Jordan, from Wearside, who entered an FA competition advertised on the back of a Frosties packet six weeks ago and ended up winning the chance to represent his country at Euro 2012. Incredible scenes.
5. Most alarming reconstructed hairdo of the day
Sadly, the TV producers in the England v France game stopped panning to pretty ladies inn the crowd and instead 'treated' us to a series of cut-aways focussing on suspended England forward Wayne Rooney. In essence, all this achieved was to make the world wholly aware of the disastrous state Wazza's Barnet transplant has now got to. Sure, Wayne, fix the receding hairline by all means. But there's no need for the floppy fringe - it looks like you've stolen Rodney Trotter's clip-on ponytail from that classic episode of Only Fools and Horses, and glued it to your forehead. Tut tut. Rooney won't play until the third group game, but stands at 75.00 to be top goalscorer at Euro 2012.
6. Fluffed last gasp chance to save the day
This fell to Sweden's Johan Elmander. After an enterprising one-two with Zlatan in the 89th minute, Elmander went through on the Ukraine goal, but panicked, looping his effort high and wide of the target. Bolton fans don't miss that particular brand of clinical finishing.
7. Bragging rights of the day
Unfortunately for England, and their 'keeper Joe Hart, today's bragging rights are all Samir Nasri's. "I can't wait to get back to Manchester for pre-season," said the City man after beating team mate Hart at his near post. "Because I'm going to tease Joe about that one!"
8. Lookalike of the day
Zlatan Ibrahimovic is a doppleganger for Aussie Olympic swimming legend Ian Thorpe - and Zlatan's Sweden side are struggling in the deep end after yesterday's defeat. Badooomtush. Sweden are out at 5.50 to qualify for the knockout stages.
9. Injury curse of the day
It was no surprise to see the England injury curse continue last night, but what did come as a bolt out of the blue was the identity of the latest victim… Goalkeeper coach Ray Clemence freakily snapped his Achilles tendon in the warm-up, and has since flown home for an operation. Fortunately, England have two goalkeeper coaches in Poland, and Dave Watson will now take sole charge of Hart, Green and Butland from here on in.
10. The ‘Class Is Permanent’ story of the day
Ukraine’s veteran captain Andriy Shevchenko may be in the latter stages of his illustrious career, but he’s enjoying something of an Indian summer, as proved by last night’s heroics. Two vintage Sheva goals, both borne out of sharp movement and predatory instinct, took the hosts to victory, and propelled the 35-year-old’s status even closer to the hearts of his nation. He's now at 20.00 to finish as the tournament's top goalscorer.