What Christmas present do you buy a tennis player who has everything?
That's what the friends and relatives of the world's top players will be doing right now; racking their brains to pick out something suitable.
Here are a few items they might find on the 'Dear Santa' letters of their loved ones:
Please can I have a best man?
Love, Andy Murray.
The British No.1 is getting married next year, and he's going to need a wing man.
He can forget about Dani Vallverdu, his best mate since his Barcelona tennis academy days and, until recently, his number two coach. Murray sacked the poor sod earlier this month. Yes, bestie is supposed to unearth a few stories from a groom's bachelor days but Murray might get more embarrassment than he bargained for if he appoints his (possibly rankled) ex-coach.
Please can I have a pipe and slippers?
Love, Roger Federer.
All respect to you, Roger, but when oh when are you going to retire? Why drag it out? Why not ask Santa for the finest meerschaum pipe and most stylish Gucci slippers, sit back, and ease into a well deserved retirement?
You'll struggle to win another Grand Slam, so finish your career as we all want to remember you: on a high.
Please can I have some golf balls?
Love, Caroline Wozniacki.
The Danish No.1 must have run out of golf balls by now. She used to get oodles of them free from her fiancé Rory McIlroy but since the couple split up her supplies have surely dwindled. A few boxes of Titleist would now make for a perfect stocking filler.
Please can I have some mouthwash?
Love, Maria Sharapova.
Sweet-shop shelves the world over are groaning beneath the weight of the Russian No.1's massive selection of Sugarpova confectionery. Her own larder is hardly shy of the sugary snacks either, ensuring that her lovely teeth are taking a bit of a battering. Dentists would recommend extra-strong mouthwash.
Please can I have a session with a chiropractor?
Love, Milos Raonic.
Look at the Canadian's dynamic service action, and you realise what a toll it must take on his poor skeleton. It would be a brave chiropractor who agrees to treat him come the Christmas break.
Please can I have some business cards?
Love, Agnieszka Radwanska.
Even die-hard fans of the Polish player occasionally have trouble spelling her name correctly. Add to this her long-term coach Tomasz Wiktorowski, and the fact she has just hired Martina Navratilova as her new coach, and you get an entourage whose names would stump the world Scrabble champion. The only way to avoid typos is to hand out business cards at any opportunity.
All the players on our Christmas list are looking good for next month's Australian Open.
Unibet have Federer, Murray and Raonic as 2nd, 4th and 10th favourite to win at 7.00, 10.00 and 51.00 respectively.
In the women's draw, Sharapova, Wozniacki and Radwanska are 3rd, 5th and 9th favourite at 6.00, 10.00 and 26.00 respectively.